Rogue Com Guard: Into the Deep Dark

[DeJaVu]

[05 May 3072; Now In Print] If you promise to keep it to yourself, I'll let you in on a little secret: every reviewer, every critic, every armchair author or actor has that one book, vid or album which they love more than any other but which in their heart of hearts they know beyond all shadow of a doubt is complete and utter crap. It's true, though most won't admit it. I, however, have no qualms about admitting to my own crappy love: Rogue Com Guard.

For those who fool themselves that their tastes are any better than my own and thereby willingly deprive themselves of this gloriously cheesy series, here's the lowdown: Our nameless hero was once a MechWarrior in the ranks of the Com Guards, the last survivor of his unit during the apocalyptic Battle of Tukayyid. Accused of betraying his fellows and hounded by the merciless Precentor-Inspector Harlowe Faust, he travels the Inner Sphere, searching for a peaceful place to call home but always encountering those who have need of his services. Later in the series (in 3067's Escape from Epsilon Eridani), Faust is killed by an unknown assassin within ComStar but not before he recognizes the protagonist's innocence and receives forgiveness for his dogged pursuit over the years. Faust is replaced (in 3070's Symphony of Death) by Adept Iolande Nyx, a mysterious operative with dreadful cybernetic enhancements that make her an implacable hunter and a deadly killer, and the hunt continues, with our hero never resting in one place for long before fate and his past force him to move on to the next planet.
And there, in a nutshell, is all you need to know about Rogue Com Guard. I could tell you about the author, one Tecumseh Jarrow, but any information I were to give you would be brief and inconclusive for Jarrow is widely believed to be a pen name for an otherwise unknown author. Some have speculated that Anastasius Focht himself is the true (and prolific; every year since 3053 has seen six installments added to the series!) author while others claim that differing styles over the years point to Jarrow being the cover identity for a rotating group of writers. Pretty much everyone agrees that the series barely qualifies as readable and represents the worst excesses of pulp literature. The plots are pretty much interchangeable. The characters are often one-dimensional caricatures, at best. The action scenes are clichéd and repetitive. Yet the series remains as inexplicably popular as ever.
Which brings us to my review of Into the Deep Dark, the latest installment from Gjallarhorn Press. But what can I say about it? These types of books are notoriously hard to review. Those who enjoy them won't be dissuaded by a scathing review in some hoity-toity journal. Those who don't enjoy them won't be convinced to try them out no matter what I say. So here goes: It's so, so bad. But it's also so, so good. If you love cheesy action and improbable scenarios, you'll love this book. If not, then your world must be a lot less fun for it.
-- Merilee Whitehead